ipostparcelsemail@dhlparcel.co.uk

(augmented-reality,) show all


Dear Friend,


I hope that you are in good health and of high mental wealth. The motive of my correspondence is to ask that you may be able to assist me in a particular manner, as you are adept at the perception of such verbosity which lies herein.

Recently my tastes have shifted somewhat; from twaddly college rock I have evolved and become firmly rooted in the realms of Pantera, Metallica and U2. Particularly for the latter two bands I have always expressed disdain, however at some age (if not already) I am sure you will mature and agree that they are truly inspirational.

My divulgence is digression, as the tastes I really cite have a far more contraband appeal than the aforementioned pop rock endeavors - for the mastubatory habits I possess have become excessive and debilitating. On a regular basis I encrust all unwashed items of clothing in my possession with semen, and I have noticed changes in my manhood which appear to be resultant of the aggressive and damaging tugging I apply, typically between ten and twenty times every twenty-four hours. These however are inconsequential factors, as implications are caused by my shift of preferences in the sexual spectrum: I now regularly seek violent sexual encounters, and routinely view snuff pornography.

The reason I contact you is because, as you can imagine, I feel troubled by the feelings and compulsions I experience. Nevertheless my reign over the emotions is reaching an apex and I understand now that I can rid myself of this somewhat inconvenient affliction, via the enactment of a conclusive scenario. Basically what I am trying to say is that I want to buttfuck a woman, from behind, and chop her head off when I ejaculate. Preferably I would like her head to roll on the floor in such a way that her departed eyes would stare back at me as I slowly extract my cock from her defunct ass.

I call upon you, friend, in my hour of need because I do not even know where to start. Also I need a guillotine or samurai sword and a place to do it. Also if you could ensure the head rolls like I mentioned, that would be great. In the meantime I'll work on securing the woman.


Yours,
Carl


Bono, reality, augmented-reality, pop-rock, drug-free


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